You work out of a Hotel?
so he stopped for a second, looked up at me and said in a really creepy voice, "I can has cheeseburger?" and then went back to eating me out.
Imagine if sharks could walk on land...scary.
Our relationship just reached the stage where i can touch her boobs while making a honking noise without getting hit in the face
at what point did putting a bag of doritos in the freezer seem like a really good idea?
I'll be there in 5 min. If not, read this again.
I would like to add..this is the first november for two years that i haven't cheated on a bf...thank you..thank you
Experimentation with dessert toppings followed by shower sex. Only logical progression bro.
She still cant shoot whiskey?
Im having serious doubts about this relationship
Rule #127: If your going to try fuck a married guy, you gotta be hotter then his wife; diet starts today.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
I feel like a cloud. A cloud that wants to be laid.
I went full Overly Attached Girlfriend. You never go full OAG.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
1. Why did we have the team Chirstmas party in November 2. Why didn't anyone tell me the coaches were invited 3. Why did coach get the giant vibrator I brought
Randomize
