Lost. The hour! Funtime!!!!
wow. When I'm done with him he's going to have to pop his collar in necessity and not just douchery
god. i hate danny gokey.
Hes like the kid in school that reminds the teacher they forgot to assign homeowrk.
he's mormon right? lame.
do you want me to make hamburgers?
i'm vegan
i'll put lettuce on them
She’s leaving for college so I made her a gift basket with all the essentials. You know- Ramen, a 12 pack of PBR, some leftover Plan B pills and a laminated business card for a good lawyer. Damn I’m a good big sister.
I am going to get arrested. I am yelling fuck repeatedly, wearing a Bird jersey and polka dot pants while pounding wine. Amazing mug shot to follow.
I am going to ride along with a cop tonight so please don't get arrested because that would be super awkward for me.
I'm out of town so we should be golden.
All you need to know is that isn't jizz
he just looked at me, said "i think i'll keep you around, you put the seat back up and everything," and then burst into tears.
Basically, what i'm trying to say is, if you don't have something, excuse or gift, to satisfy my anger i am going to look you in the eye and piss on the floor.
you gave a quesadilla a blow job with sour cream at Denny's.
I'm permanently fucked. Every liquid I put into my mouth automatically tastes like fireball.
Me and my bruised tit have to wake up at 4 AM.
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I gotta stop fucking the bouncers. We are running out of bars to go to.
Randomize
