This chick, for whatever reason, has serious "Leave your wife and kids and also break up her young marriage in order to frolick for a good 2 weeks before I realize that she's just like the rest of them and I made a huge mistake and ruined a lot of lives in the process" potential. It's SO INTRIGUING.
So she said grabbing my cock was like holding a giant crayola from pre-school.
that was the beginning of the end.
Lol i'z typing this with my 962 nose
962=my?
Yeah.i
fter the third song from an iPod commercial played I realized how much that frat sucked.
I don't know what's worse....that fact that my dog ate my vibrator or that he later puked it up on my bed
once you have herpes you dont really care what goes in your mouth anymore.
at what point last night did we decide it was okay to let me hitch hike to another bar?
Well she just peed in a pot and is now trying to boil it
sometimes i feel like my only option in life is to be drunk or be a cat. today i am drunk
Maybe I'm a robot.
You can't be that drunk already
I waxed the left side of it and was in too much pain to do the right side so my crotch looks like cruella devil
Don't get me wrong, I love talking about lube and such, but why are we?
i dont know whats weirder. that i told him he stabbed me in my dream or that he told me i wasnt the first girl to tell him theyve been killed by him in a dream
he came to me for relationship advice and we ended up fucking in my backseat
You have a husband. I have a bag full of electronics. This, is the single life.
Randomize
