Your mouth is God's brothel.
omg. I had the wrong window open and I accidentaly posted my credit card # on twitter
Whats your twitter name
the condom got lost in my hair
i need a new camera phone. my pictures from last night are as blurry as my memories. and neither tell me why i woke up in an airplane hangar.
I made weed fried chicken. What have you done today?
I told you, I don't give a SHIT about their music. I JUST. WANT. TO FUCK. THE BASSIST.
i woke up in just my socks. my clothes were outside, he had rugburn on his elbows, and a window was broken.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
Hahahaha .. If it makes you feel better I had a sex dream about a cheeseburger last night so I feel like we both lose.
I don't know if I'm more excited about sex or that I have an excuse to smoke a cigarette
I don't care what you say about him, his cock is the stuff dreams are made of.
Why didn't you ever bring me to the pope as a baby so he could kiss me.
Still alive. Just brushed my teeth with fireball.
Your youporn search history says otherwise.
Sorry, was sleeping. I heard a rumor that I had a hangover, so I just went with it...
Randomize
