pissed the bed twice, first one side then rolled over , other side. boom.
Every time I hang out with your gay friend, I have to make a checklist of words to look up when I get home. First Google of the night? "Power bottom."
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
i have a strong feeling i fucked one of the waiters here...
oh come on since when have relationships been boundary lines for us
fair point
I'll be really easy to find... I'm the naked one rolling around in cats.
All that fucking tequilla made my head feel like it's inside of a body builder's asshole. He's doing squats.
Its everclear night, yall need carbs in your body!
Also, even though this really sucks now, we will look back on this one day and laugh at the time we all got arrested on Thanksgiving
i think i just asked a donut if it was ok
We climaxed at the same time during ain't no mountain high enough. Does it get more cheesy or domestic for a non relationship?
I'm scrolling through our convo thread and all we talk about is pizza, alcohol & dick with the occasional "I miss you" thrown in.
I've had sex with three people who have this birthday.
I can guarantee he will smoke me out and I won't feel bad about it because he gets to touch my butt.
21st birthday weekend in Vegas has concluded and all I'm missing is my underwear and 'Contacts' icon on my phone home screen.
Randomize
