so i did it. i barked while i was ejaculating. not a word was said by either of us afterwards.
so how much did i say i owed you?
$5 and a new fuck buddy.
dude im shwasted, kabul is not the best place for this
I got so high that I decided to drive with my knees on the way home. Where am I going in life?
Nowhere
YouTube is recomending me a video on how to make a home made meth bong, what has my life come to?
it was either that or behind a dumpster, and i am way too pretty to pee behind a dumpster
She's doing shots in her underwear, a fur hat and mittens. I'm never coming home.
Just spiked the bong with a ludens cough drop with hopes it soothes my throat after i rip it.
It turns out tequila bombs is really code for straight shots of tequila…who would have guessed?
Tonight, a friend walked in and said "oh look at that. Drunk on the living room floor. Just as expected." this is my life. This is my life.
Seeing the pictures of him and i, I'm giving whiskey the win on this one. Definitely had beer goggles.
Here is your half hour reminder. Meet you at emergency room.
Getting haircut. The stylist asked about the body paint dried in my hair. I told her there was prob glitter, too. It was a fun night!
Dad's teaching me to make moonshine this weekend as "college prep". How scared should I be sis?
He said the main reason he fucked me was cause of my storm trooper tattoo. IT ATTRACHES ALL THE HOT NERDS
He went down on me for an hour and a half. He needs to get promoted more often.
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