weddingsv make me drug and hornr
how do you say "fuck me and leave bruises" in italian?
I know we had a good night last night because his turtle was half asleep chewing on the used condom.
I know the scar will be in an obvious place, that's why I'm certain it'll score me cancer blowjobs
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
Yea I saw a friend of yours carrying your limp body somewhere
When you and that girl went into the bedroom, you yelled "FOR NARNIA!"
My alarm went off and I went straight for your dick. That's dedication.
I am at a new level of appreciation for drunk-you, who threw up into her own sweatshirt pocket last night in the car. Brava.
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
I just woke up hand cuffed to the bar and shirtless, so yeah I think I need you to come get me.
You did an excessive amount of blow and then screamed "WHO THE FUCK NEEDS A LADDER?!" And then Mario style wall-jumped onto the roof. It was one of the most impressive things I've ever seen.
How does it make you feel that I can't control my vagina around you?
Lunch date was a success. And you'll be proud- my legs stayed closed.
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