Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
and on the seventh day, God created megan fox
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
I'm drinking red wine & feeding anchovies to the dog. I'm really not picky about what kinda of company I'm in.
at 6am he came into my room and kicked me in the stomach. when i finally got up he was passed out in my hallway and the bathtub water was running
It's also dangerous to ride a bike down the stairs after a few beers, but I've done it.
Just filled the brita up in the bathtub because we couldn't get it into the sink.
It's four o'clock and my 60yo aunt's tits have already made an appearance and there is a dildo traveling around the room periodically assaulting family members. Strangely I am thankful.
No The bastards made me buy a new one, They don't cover water damage an apparently they consider salsa water damage
Oh and I ate all of your Cinnamon Toast Crunch. Consider it part of your reparation payment for accidental anal insertion. I may continue to collect payments until I am no longer sore.
The cop asked you after the breathalyzer what you think you blew and you very discreetly shouted "I'm pretty sure i blew Kyle on the way here "
Dude, for twins they have shockingly different blowjob styles.
STOP FUCKING MY SISTERS!!!!
We had sex on a dog bed..
He just went to a job interview a sharpie moustache drawn on his face..
We found him sitting in the back of the club crying into a strippers lap. She told us he missed his pet frog and to come back later.
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