Sad Moment: I only had enough $ at 711 to buy chips or salsa. I chose salsa and took a plastic spoon
we seriously had to hang a plastic bag on his ears so he could throw up right into it.
Just saw two dudes run across the street carrying a mini keg and a scaled model of the empire state building. Missed this town
BOOTY CALL IN EFFECT, BOOTY CALL IN PROCESS, BOOTY CALL ACCEPTED, AND BOOTY CALL INITIATES FRIDAY NIGHT.
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
I haven't been that free with the boobs since I was 19. I'm putting them away for a while.
If you insist
The one guy literally flopped my boob out. Yes I insist.
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
The walk home lasted longer than the sex. He lives in the flat above the bar.
Dude, you were tagged in a stripper FB selfie. That is a whole new level of something.....
If I send you a picture of a dick will you give me your honest reaction?
Who's the captain of your team? Captain Morgan as usual?
And me
Do we have to do this party tonight? I'm worried my bed will miss me...
I miss my bedroom and my bed and being able to spray myself with my choice of 15 different perfumes so I don't have to wake up to the smell of my past sins
I'd date him. I'd date the fucking shit out of him.
i dunno but you just looked at him said "youre making me really wet" and straight pissed your pants
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