we'll penetrate his innocence with our dicks
you handled that situation with as much grace as someone puking involuntarily could
he just voluntarily told me he was uncircumsized.. and that his favorite color was blue.
My suggestion that we all just smoke some weed was greeted with a uncomfrotable silence and a 'maybe later'. These are not our people
There's just something about sucking a flaccid dick that makes me feel so calm. Like a baby cow..
i probably shouldve stopped when i uncurled the curly straw in my cocktail because it was slowing me down
Dangr zzzzzzzzone
how is telling me how long you drunkenly fucked someone supposed to make me miss you?
I'll even give you a complementary welcome blowjob.
He walked away from the girl that just blew him to hook up with another girl, and when she got pissed he just turned around and screamed, "SHE IS LIKE 10X HOTTER THAN YOU!" Then she went on an angry dick sucking rampage. There were 4 victims.
She stumbled into class and Google image searched nipple piercings for the entire 75 minutes
so I guess I made a note in my phone last night to remind myself not to do shrooms on the cruise ship
I got arrested FOR running from the cops. In college Dad got arrested and THEN ran from the cops. So it could be worse.
when ur drunk laser tag is all fun n games. try it high and all of the aliens in the galaxy want you dead.
Just saw you run by my class yelling "fuck you!". Good luck and stay human!
Randomize
