I've been thinking and really it's a miracle I haven't had an STD yet.
Should I text him? Life is confusing when you actually like someone instead of just wanting to blow them.
Just beat my spinning in office chair record. Almost puked. Totally worth it.
We shouldn"t be alone together
you didn"t say that yesterday
you weren't married yesterday
And then i had a penis in each hand. It was magical.
we found you outside the hotel room sleeping with a note next to you that said " we made sure you were comfortable, hope your friends come back soon"
I'm cheerleading for traffic. people are staring. Why am i the only high person on the way to class?
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Attempting to sleep without a bra since i got my nips pierced wish me luck. Also almost sent that to my coworker.
You left something at the house but since I'm back home now so I can just mail it over. Address?
I didn't realize you could put dignity in a box these days.
she came into my car to rip lines with our blow dealer as I was writing my essay on anti drug policy, i call it on site research
gin. gin. Gin. GIN GIN GINGINFFdJH
Her cop pants made me imagine I was riding a unicorn and by unicorn I mean her face
im gonna shove his purity ring down his throat
I’m getting back at my ex and training my new boy toy how to properly satisfy a woman. I’m killing two birds with one dick.
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