You know you want to come over later
1:27a: Um no
1:45a: Maybe
2:05a: Probably
2:38a: I'm outside, let me in
we should wear snuggies to the strip club
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Well if were past the bullshitting stage yes if not then no I'm not that kind of guy
You kept saying,"there's a seahorse in my stomach, who's trying escape". This was after the curtains attacked you.
I asked her to make me water, which in turn meant get me a glass. She handed me a cup of microwaved ice cubes.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Dude, I traded weed for crunch berries. Happy Thursday.
Do you remember biting my ear and whispering quotes of Pride and Prejudice last night?
Awk. Hanging with her while messaging her ex about sex injuries he gave me
SOS... STANDING IN THE BAR NEXT TO MY BF AND THE GUY WHO I HOOKED UP WITH ON CHRISTMAS DAY..
CAPS.LOCK.AND.SPACEBAR.ARE.BROKEN.
I am not walking across campus just to give you a blow job in the hopes that in return i can study more efficiently.
Everyone needs to leave the house so I can use the good vibrator without being judged.
If I ever say "I'm never drinking again" just hand me a bottle of jack. I'll snap out of it.
Randomize
