3 different guys in my psych class know me as 3 different names and said hi to me with all 3 different names-Andrea, Grace, and Bella
I've never been more proud of you
and now there are teeth marks on my dick.
I could hear them screwing through my bedroom wall again this morning, so I started beat boxing to the tempo.
I can feel his 12 year old sister"s eyes barreling into my soul everytime I'm at there house..some how she knows I'm cheating on her brother or she's mad cause I stole her shirt.
it's only monday and im already failing all my classes. i give up. tequila tuesday is my only friend.
As soon as they started using chocolate milk as a chaser for captain Morgan, I thought l it'd be best to leave.
Downside to Halloween: you can't tell if the guy dressed as Gene Simmons from KISS that keeps flirting with you is hot or not...I decided to err on the side of caution and assume not...
He said he wanted to "superfuck" me
Does he wear a cape??
passed out in the hallway last night, now I'm sitting down in the shower, eating lukewarm canned soup out of Tupperware, listening to Carly rae jepsen.. I had a rough night.
I bruised my dick hopping over that fence last night
Holy shit, I wanna ride him into the horizon.
Statistics show that guys with slightly higher IQ scores and overly-trimmed eyebrows have micro penises. It's science.
I don't know what's worse the fact that I woke up with a clit piercing or the fact that I didn't pay for it.
We need to stop going on dates to the strip club.
So the makeout sesh? Not so great. His stubble rubbed my face raw, he tried to push me towards auto-erotic asphyxiation, and he licked my forehead. Twice.
Randomize
