you told everyone your name was brenda and you had the whole party chanting b-dawgg by the end of the night. successful.
Spider just rapelled from her vag rethinking online dating.
My mom walked down and caught me drinking by myself, watching the nanny at 3:30AM. I had no idea what to say
Apparently I mistakenly called the hair club for men at 3am... they called me back this morning.
I assume it was your influence that had me go from DD to waking up out on the deck with one eyebrow shaved off??
After the party last night, I dreamt I continued drinking... Apparently my subconscious didn't think I'd had enough...
we found him passed out on the baseball field with two 40oz and wearing a tophat.
Where did he get the tophat?
I just need to stop hanging out with girls who drink wine coolers.
I hooked up with a guy dressed up as morning wood. Needless to say he lived up to his costume.
totally just stole a 24 pack straight out of the miller truck
Now that mom and dad sold the camper, do you think it's okay to talk about all the sex I had in it?
I can't believe you won 5 grand from the casio last night and spent more than 80% on tacobell and strippers already
im questioning your sanity while also accepting your reality
I love how we can bond over the fact that we're the only ones who think the guy I drunk hooked up with looks like Voldemort
I’ve slept with a Senior, a Freshman and a Junior so far. I’m a Sophomore away from hitting for the cycle
Randomize
