you're like a bully in the Christmas story
Let's perk you up. I have a good PG joke and a picture of my penis while urinating. You pick.
Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
We saw a kid playing in poison ivy. We walked away, he'll learn his lesson.
I just found a receipt from ace where I bought 1 lrg plastic funnel, 2ft of 1" plastic tubing, and a 48" toboggan sled. Thank you cashier #552 for letting that poor life decision happen.
Hey, no judgement here...this is the girl that threw up on a box of kittens at the magician's house
He gets a blow job; I get my oil changed free of charge. And that way I only see him every 2500 miles.
I'll just dance on top of the ping pong table, and if it's stable enough for that, then it's stable enough for sex
Screw disneyland. This military base is the happiest place on earth. Even unnatractive dudes are completely fuckable in those uniforms, im never leaving
Nothing says "future AA member" like bonging 40's out of a plastic flamingo.
Probably TMI here but I just rubbed one out while listening to thunderstruck, almost ripped my dick off.
Shawn wouldn't stop singing about his cock on the ride home that night it freaked my girlfriend out how consistent he was
Vodka Vensday. With a Russian accent... It counts.
To be clear you just said "I'll give you a baby" as a sext?
After the bar we stopped to Meijer where I found myself singing little mermaid while rubbing a pack of hotdogs on my face..
Randomize
