is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Remember that night when i almost got you arrested? Is that funny yet?
At victory brunch. Have a decent story. Im now eskimo brother with the duke mens basketball teams from 2002 to 2008 and obamas right hand man
I don't think I can handle being a slut. There is a lot more emotional stress that I never realized.
I don't know which is a more impressive stolen object. The couch from a sheer logistical viewpoint, or the parking meter because i'm pretty sure that's a federal offence.
The polish Muslims are throwin paczkis into the crowd and I'm beer 6 before 11 am
His kisses tasted like beef jerky and captain morgan. I'm pretty sure I came before he even took my clothes off.
It's not slutty if it's for workout purposes...right?
I wonder what it's like for my roommate to live bicuriously thro my sex life
Use "feeling words"
Yay
He showed up at my apartment drunk with a telescope wanting me to look at the "blown up star" in -24 degree weather, claiming "it's in the name if science"
I just realized how terrible that was... I was drumming on your penis to a song about Baby Jesus.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
In the last 2 hours I managed to have romantic starlit sex on the beach as the tide came in with not only just a gorgeous man, but one who happens to be Eastern European and finishing Harvard law school.
Oh wow. I want to be you right now.
If you can wrestle my underwear off of me, you can top. It'll be like using an amulet in Legends of the Hidden Temple. Instead of not getting captured, you don't get fucked in the ass.
Randomize
