I asked him if he wanted to go to my place, he said i could go but he was gonna stay
so chris just stuck his hand between rachel's legs and yelled 'TROUT!' and we were like...you're wasted
Any day that starts with a call from my ex-bf... crying... is a good day.
I'm to the point in my high that every song eventually turns into Lady Gaga
So there I was.....spitting on my goldfish just to keep it alive.
I didn't wanna be that girl that took a shit in the ocean..
Some kid just walked into class with his schedlue written on a keystone box.
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
your dad made us margaritas and breakfast on the morning. I think it's safe to say he relives his glory days through us
Yeah, half my ass was burnt and I was missing a shoe. I'm blaming you for the shoe.
JUST BECAUSE I LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED DOESNT MEAN IM GOING TO LIKE TO BE TIED UP AND SPANKED AT WORK
Opened my notebook to coke all over the pages. So, if that's any indication on how this weekend went.
I found a bar with Metallica and a fire eater. I'm home
No ive been in the mountains getting high and baking cookies with a 4 year old
Boys winking, cowboys tipping their hats, old people looking disappointed.... ah, I had forgotten the unholy powers of exposed cleavage!
You are my hero.
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