Don't bone anyone, just think of ur vibrator lol
HHaaaaaaaaa mmmmn vibrator
when people say theyve been sober for however many years is that like couple beers not drunk sober, or no drinking sober?
she's doing push ups on the keg. hows a girl supposed to compete with that?
Ricky Martin is gay. You owe me $10 from 3rd grade.
someday when you wake up in a dumpster we'll have to have this conversation again...
I just found a babydoll head in my sink where we ripped it off and did shots out of it.
he quoted the bible to break up with me
I'd like to say yes, but I nearly lost my shit when I assumed there was no back to my house. I am not strong enough for hallucinations.
I bet George Washington got SERIOUS head back in his hay day.
He passed out again after sex. I've hidden all his clothes. There's no way he is sneaking out in the morning this time!
I literally just fucked insane clown pussy. 24 yo nut job moonlights at children's parties. Gave me head while still in full clown makeup from my kid's birthday party.
Usually I just ask myself "have I been naked here?" If the answer is no I correct the situation.
Do you feel better now that you've sent me a picture of your dick?
Yep.
Does the term "on fleek" apply to dicks or just eyebrows?
The fact that I’m not married yet means there are millions of lucky girls out there who have dodged a bullet
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