You found a girl to hook up with at a gay bar?
No. His name was Paco. I didn't get it by choice. I never had a hickey before.
you're like the Neil Armstrong of terrible hookups, you are a pioneer
We were driving to yogurt express by state and these girls mooned is while they passed us and we saw full vag complete with tampon string dangling.
I mistook a propane tank for a keg.
it's a little hard to watch the basketball games with my family considering they keep cheering for the guy that i had a one night stand with...
We did a shot for each one. Father... son... and holy ghost. That wasn't enough though so we moved on to toasting dead relatives.
I hope my shame shaped pee stain outside your door goes away soon.
Close. The correct answer is shitting in a public toilet. We also would have accepted the pit of despair.
How the fuck did you end up in a tree? With multiple people?
don't trust your eyes. just sniff them. if they smell like axe, they are broke, move on to the next.
She pulled up to the bar in a limo, wasted, and alone. Gets out, shrugs and slurs "I couldn't find a cab" and proceeds to take a shot.
I'm in love.
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Whenever someone said no you would yell "Die Motherfucker." Kind of like some twisted drinking game.
Are we at that level of friendship where we can share slutty stories and not hold it against the other person at a later date ?
So this ukranian guy got angry and took his clothes off. Now he has my credit card and I can't find my keys.
Randomize
