He was all up on my grill like I was having a BBQ. I DONT EVEN KNOW HOW TO USE A GRILL.
If I had a penis I would totaly hang shit off it. Like stretched out peach rings and fruit rollups.
So then the officer asked you how you were getting home and you told him "very carefully"
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
Do you think my job would send me for a second drug test if i took a whole pumpkin pie to work for lunch tomorrow?
I don't know what's more sad. The fact that I'm genuinely impressed about being sober for a whole 3 days or the fact that I want to get wasted in celebration.
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
Yeah, the email that I was sending to get an Escort for the weekend, copied and pasted to my boss, that should be interesting conversation, when I come back from Christmas vacation break.
Phil and I agree that the level of sand in your vagina rivals that of many of the earth's largest deserts
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Trust me. My dick only does selfies for you.
I don't think I'll get invited back. I drunkenly told her that her kids would be perfect for a pro-abortion campaign.
I'm a stupid stupid woman who is totally going to rock this holiday season dick drunk on that Ginger
you could be the only one getting laid right now....yet your sitting in here making goat noises
I just got fed by 3 guys. I love my job.
Randomize
