If this place produced love children they would be born wearing Lilly Pullitzer with raging coke addictions.
I had a talk with my mom about respecting myself and not acting like a whore so she will rip my nose ring out if she somehow sees that picture
why is there a sandwich nailed to the wall
do you ever think like no deep thought could take place in the spanish language? like all they talk about is like tacos?
how high are you?
Grown men dancing to Spice Girls and a girl wearing one shoe. I belong here
I should have some sort of frequent buyer card or something. I just bought my third bottle of Captain this week. It's Wednesday.
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Saw a sign earlier "Domino's Lava Cakes $3.00" and I thought of you. This text brought to you by thing I don't need to know about your sex life.
Just break the ice by asking who had to take plan b this past semester
My roommate made me a peanut butter and sprinkles sandwich. Maybe tonight isn't that bad
So I was about the only one NOT pregaming or stoned at my aunt's funeral... Maybe thats why I'm the black sheep.
Am I really that high, or did I just spray febreeze outside ?
Watching the series finale of Friends and crying in my Thai food. I don't like hangover Jared.
It's not stalking if you do it on LinkedIn...
We're at an agreement where I don't pry and she pretends blissful ignorance
Randomize
