just watched an entire episode so you think you can dance for head. so wasn't worth it
I have one brief flash of having his dick in my hand. that's all I remember.
My itunes is telling me i listened to toxic by b spears 108 times last night
yeah you're probably right.. i should stop equating love with getting naked on a webcam for him.
You said your dick dragged you up the stairs
Someone with the Instagram name "hymenbreaker" just liked a photo of me and my grandma. I feel ashamed.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
These people don't understand my stages of drunk
Is your gma going to be okay with me passed out drunk on the ground
and the oscar for 'most creative swearing' goes to you for 'jesus's bloody fucksticks'
There's not really an emoticon that says "I'm sorry I honked your boobs, and that you weren't a fan of that."
Tacos and sex are way better than any anti depressant pill ever was. I think I made a medical discovery here.
I made out with the uber driver for free weed, I thought he deserved it
Something I never want to forget. I'm in a porta potty and she is outside knocking on the door going "You're a queen. You're a queen. Never think any different"
I'm fucking camped out by the bathrooms. I think the poopatrator is in there. Wtf is my life
Almost an end to the saga.
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