Note to self: Not getting laid all weekend makes girls in mondays classes racks seem enormously bigger.
double majoring has taught me only that psych majors are sluttier than govt majors
You were humming mission impossible as we ran from the cops
Be honest with Daniel. He was a good rebound to you for nine months and he made it so you could be with the one you really love and care for now. Just tell him thanks and best of luck.
Operation liquormelon is in full effect. We may die tonight.
Can I just say that you're probably one of my favorite people to have sex with and then eat hummus with at 3:45am?
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
I am honored my friend, to hold the decision of what enters your body
You know what, don't say anything. You all made fun on me for saying I would fuck him junior year when he taught us algebra and six years later, HERE I AM.
I've never been more scared for my virginity in my life. And I lost my virginity almost 6 years ago.
Is it too early to get staydrunk at 1pm on Friday for Monday's St Patty's day
I just did the math technically I'll be drunk until 2:30-3:00pm
he called me ma'am when we were fucking last night...he's five years older than me. I think I'm in love.
These are the things that make me so grateful... that I slept with your sister instead.
You were so drunk last night that you fell thru the bathroom door at the bar, ripping it off the hinges in the process. But, your birthday tiara stayed on thru the whole thing. I'd call it a succcessful evening. Happy birthday kiddo!
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