Oh My! A car just drove by me a splashed me with a wave of water. I am drenched and soaking wet!
I am sorry--all I heard is that you are wet.
I wonder how skeet ulrich feels about the skeet skeet phrase and and what it denotes.
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
I can't wait to go to grad school so I am not your high unemployed friend.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
We've completely outdone ourselves. We packaged a collective total of six grams of pot and salvia into little bowl-sized tinfoil capsules. It's totally impossible to tell which is which without comparing, every Friday from now on we pick one out and see what the fuck happens
hey the jello shots wont freeze
How much Everclear did you put in them?
uhhh all of it
I've got a 90 day supply of amoxicillin in case of zombie or chlamydia outbreak
A dude was barking out of one of the buildings so I barked back and he goes, "Oh shit! She barked back! Come to room 803 I'll fuck you!"
Thought about it. I'm gonna go to work, but I'm gonna tell them I wrestled a bear saying I fell just isn't working.
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I knew you were cut off when you tried to order a "Phil Collins"
There's hope in those eyes, for a better tomorrow or more cocaine, we may never know, but there's hope.
in mid sex he pointed out my great gatsby tattoo and we started discussing themes and metaphors from our fave fitzgerald novels
you need to stop fucking English majors
Convinced if I was being murdered in my house no one would come and save me. If no one heard my 10000000 orgasms last night, there is no hope.
Randomize
