So instead of cumming in her, I peed in her...
What did she do!?
I didn't tell her...
i was unsuccessful, further solidifying for me that girls should not masturbate.
you lied. pity sex is amazing.
We can smell you smoking weed from downstairs and your little brother is asking why the upstairs smells like gasoline. Please smoke in the basement. XOXO dad.
this bucketlist has just become an excuse for me to be slutty, and i'm not even ashamed
Saying you want a bj does not count as saying you wanna see me btw.
Can you bring me a pair of sunglasses to the bathroom please... Don't judge me.
btw my roommates send a round of applause to you and that guy you tried to fuck on our wall. Additionally they hope he got it in.
She went home with him because he works at Jimmy John's and his car "smelled like meat"
Nobody is stopping the marines from drinking in class on veterans day. They literally brought a cooler with a bottle of whiskey and vodka on ice. And are passing out red cups to anyone interested. Staying in Vegas for college has officialy become an A+ decision
The party got hot, we all started raging, took off some clothes, someone threw me in the shower and we all kept raging. Nude Rager, I was there at the point of conception.
found $100 my ex got arrested and I can receive free health insurance I gotta tell ya 2014 is really going to be my year
I tried sex in a car once. It was like trying to do yoga in a drainage pipe with your arms and legs tied while using a typewriter with your penis.
3 cups of coffee and some molly. The "Tay's Day Off Diet"
Lol I'm just saying its too early for your penis, I can accept it but at a more decent hour
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