is it normal that we went to that class once and both got 100's on the final? ohhhh, arizona state.
I just almost got out my car and drop kicked this one chick over parking. Welcome to the first day of spring semester.
dude, it should not be this hard to find a bottomless mimosa on a friday morning
I made friends with a raccoon. I pet it. Like I was Pocahontas.
I feel wrong giving my mom a cash gift full of dirty stripper money.
There are work activities and non work activities and dunking my head in a bucket of ice water pulling it out and shotguning a beer is certainly not a work activity
Also, as my manager i'm going to put you in charge of making sure i don't drown.
You should have thought about how you were going to treat me before having me take photos of your asshole.
Didn't have the heart to tell him that while he was eating my ass I was laughing, not moaning, into the pillow
I am buying anal lube, an enema, and a bag of kit kats. What part of this is compelling the Walgreens woman to tell me to "be well".
so at 3am I stumbled into my parents house and crawled into bed with them, I need to start dating.
I'm so glad you haven't fallen off any more yachts
Ur here to start shit and I'm here to light that shit on fire
The drive thru lady at McDonald's asked how I was and I responded by opening the car door and throwing up all over the drive thru lane. Happy Sunday.
yeah, my mom got it for me because it had animals AND alcohol.
Randomize
