he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
Don't be mad at me. I know peeing in your drawer is 1 thing and peeing on you while you're sleeping is another, but im sorry..i love you
Saw shirtless man with angel wing tramp stamp seen biking in my neighborhood. Considering moving.
Yes..we had amazing sex that I have a 50 percent chance of remembering.
I wish the inside of the tampon box said "CONGRATULATIONS YOUR NOT A MOTHER!"
His best friend walked in while we were banging, turned on the light, yelled BURN, grabbed his computer to play the Thunderstruck drinking game, turned off the light and left.
If Megan asks I spilled my water water all over her. I pissed on your roommate. You're welcome. I expect you to keep that on the down low. Seriously tell her the water thing
He rode my dog to the bathroom and wouldn't stop laughing once he got in. It was scary.
When we were grinding I think your nuva ring fell into my shoe
I have to be more responsible. I've dropped three lighters into my bong today.
When he's drowning in your chest and he muffles out the words 'I just want to live here' that's a compliment right?
My penis has like 3 people bidding on it
I was having a serious heart-to-heart, and then the weed gummy kicked in.
I think he may actually care that I call him slampiece instead of his real name. Who knew he had feelings?
I did a line off of, and then danced on top of a table older than this country.
Harvard is great.
Randomize