my clit piercing makes the metal detector go off
She said her tits were too big, and he slapped her. He said that Jesus didn't appreciate bitches that fish for compliments
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
then he tried to tell me how many times he had seen Scott's dick. his estimate was about 180 times. he thought I didn't understand.
I wish I could walk around this campus with a big stamp that says "Approved" and just stamp girls asses as they pass.
I will kick you in all of your body parts. All at once.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
You slapped my ass and yelled "HOOTY TOOTY WHAT A BOOTY" in a Schwarzenegger voice
My orifices are off limits as long as you have that stache. Your call.
It's okay. I think we're back on. I just went on a dog walk with him n blew him on a sidewalk
I'm allotting you four buildings to piss on tonight. Choose wisely.
YOUR STATE IS STUPID
Did you miss a turn again?
WHAT FUCKING IDIOT DECIDED TO DESIGN AN ENTIRE FUCKING STATE WHERE YOU CAN'T MAKE A FUCKING LEFT TURN?!? FUCK NEW JERSEY
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
This will never work. His dick is smaller than mine.
Wow. And yours is kind of small.
RIGHT?
Okay, let's just all take a step back and think about how funny this will seem in like a year... Maybe 2 if his nose is actually broken.
Randomize
