so this carnie looked at me and said "the ride in my pants is funner." i wet myself.
i am fully taking advantage of taking advantage of him
HER PREGGO ASS BROUGHT SPEGHETTI-O'S... IN HER PURSE.
you asked the janitor if you could ride his floor cleaner.
you both peed in the photobooth after the pictures were taken.
Target doesn't accept your signature for your credit card if you draw a dick on the pad. Even of your name is Richard.
Bro she gave me the stare. It's like she boned me with her eyes. I'm going in.
There should be a rule. If your dick is under 6 inches, you are not allowed to dress as Thor.
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
I just realized that Margarita Wednesdays are so much better now when followed by No Work Thursdays.
Hey, you should go to your facebook ASAP... i'm guessing you're wasted but you just uploaded a picture of someones dick...and everyones taking bets now if its Rick or Mikes..
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Hey now one little girl thought it was cool I was covered in blood. Apparently according to her Mom she wants to be a surgeon when she grows up
Hitting up all my dealers for my birthday grams is paying off
Do you think it's my receding hair line that makes all the milfs attracted to me??
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