great sex! but now the fight over who sleeps on the wet spot starts.
if my vagina gave out awards, he should be preparing acceptance speaches for the oscar, the heisman and the nobel peace prize.
Do you know how hard it is to conceal the fact that you puked all over the bed that someone is sleeping in?
I think in growing up..I've been having a hard time masterbating to fictional characters
He kept trying to order 'sex on the tennis courts' for a drink last night
Everything smells like beer. Everything. But I cant drag myself out of bed to take a shower. So beer it is.
Let's play a little game of "Last Night Never Happened"
I just texted him and asked him to keep some in case I need help sealing the deal.
Girl Scout cookies are like roofies for fat chicks.
he had me stop mid-blow job to make me use my phone to id a song on the radio..
i wasnt really sure how to responde to that.
she came back from her house with A paper cut , a 2liter of sprite with Bacardi , and half a mustache . we're inviting her more ofte
My mouth feels like it's at the dentist but my body feels like it's at the strip club.
I used an explanation of Walking Marriages in the Mosuo Culture to successfully negotiate an open relationship. That Anthropology degree is finally starting to pay off.
Ya can’t just go throwing accusations around about someone pooping their pants without some hard evidence
I think my time would be better spent seducing the TA then trying to save this paper.
Liz Cheney wasn’t exactly on my list of women I expected to be saying “YAS QUEEN” for in 2021 but here we are
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