Hurry. And bring back up. SHE WON'T STOP TALKING.
you said you get the best orgasms off Pez dispensers. how do you think he felt????
My uncles bleeding, my brother has a black eye and my moms topless in the pool... How was your family cookout?
Just figured out I can wedge my iphone between my boobs so it stands up at a perfect handsfree reading angle. Clearly somebody up there wants me to smoke this bowl while I watch my bieber videos
I let him watch sportscenter while we fucked. How did he repay me? I'm now missing class to get a shot in the ass for the clap. You and I are getting wasted and keying someone's car this weekend.
But mostly fuck him senseless. Render him speechless. Have him look at my vagina and wonder, "WHAT SORCERY IS THIS?!"
Last night I passed a kidney stone as I came inside her. Worst. Experience. Ever.
I did the walk of shame in nothing but a sleeping bag and now I'm on my way to pick up plan B. Let's not make a habit of this.
Sounds like a good New Years
You threw your body across the gross couple hooking up on the couch and demanded they scratch your back. I love you drunk on peach schnapps
He passed out. I tried to set his chest hair on fire.
I think the biggest problem with being overhigh is when the kitchen was on fire and I was pointing and laughing and eating rootbeer oreos like it was fucking Ozzfest 2000
Well, at some point in her life every girl has to decide how much weird she's willing to tolerate for hot tall banker cock
he made me cum so hard i had an asthma attack
I'll just say I told you so at your funeral
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
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