Megan Fox is the only woman I would let pee on me.
I'm similar. She's the only woman I'd ask to pee on me.
Ok yeah you're right. I'd ASK Megan Fox to pee on me. I'd ALLOW Erin Andrews to pee on me if she asked.
Do brothers usually kiss their sisters?
Apparently he doesn't remember leaving the bar
If I spent $100 at the bar and didn't get laid I wouldn't want to remember anything either
Going to get tested monday. You're coming with. Bonding time, slut style.
Just had a drunken guest at my hotel threaten to "throw a fuckin fireball at my face"
dude you guys. You can't throw up in the recycling bin. I don't think vomit is recyclable
The key to alley sex is drunkeness.
omg i met someone at the bar who sells hair feathers. that are long. saved in my phone as "haiirs deather"
Trust me at the end of the night there will be queso smothered places you didn't think it could be smothered
I just face planted on a condom wrapper in my bed...thought of you.
You're so romantic.
I woke up on top of his counter next to a pot of boiling water and an empty package of ramen... what happened to the ramen, we will never know.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I AM CRUING IT IS 93:2 AM AND I AM CYGIN INT BED
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
all i remember is walking home without my pants on... when i woke up i was sleeping in between my parents in their bed, no more whiskey wednesdays
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