he told me my hair look so beautiful and as he was stroking it his fingers got caught in my BUMPIT. How are you supposed to explain that one?
My BOSS just pulled out a box of Christmas stuff labeled reefs.
I found him crying and drunk, in my closet holding a picture of Tyler Perry. He managed to say"he's just so many people"
Just so you know, a true one night stands ends with a 7 minute blow job after eating a sandwich she made for you while the taxi you called for her comes
She was either really drunk or really not interested. Everytime I tried to ask her about herself she would respond with a line from Stepbrothers.
I have too much pride to pick his chest hair out of my mouth again
If you come home soon there's a stripper in the shower. Don't be alarmed
There are a bunch of highly educated, advanced in their field, PUSSY ASS BITCHES in this bar
Btw kudos to your tongue last night. Sorry about that lady jizz in your beard.
Listen, unless you want to spend your birthday in a trunk, you better invite me
I think it's important to not involve Bar Food in any near future decisions.
He licked the buffalo sauce off my fingers and then we had the best sex of my life.
The man built me a fort. Of course he got laid.
I’m sorry, some of us common-folk don’t have access to steady dick
Forget Covid themed costumes. I need one that attracts a quality penis
preferably one with a six figure job and a boat
Randomize
