im sorry i didnt take advantage of you..iwaned to
i wanted you to too
On my way, I hope you have alcohol for me to blame stuff on...
i pretty much saved your life. you were so conviced that your nail polish remover bottle was "Vodka Lemon"
i don't want a singing card. it disturbs my hangover. give me a pack of cigs taped to a bottle of wine and fuck me without a condom. happy vday baby.
Defiantly just threw away our yearly bottle collection in front of the campus tour. The school should pay me for recruitment
It doesn't count as drinking alone if you're making rum cake with it.
Ohh god. I'm so nervous. This is terrible. He just introduced me as "the best girlfriend of his life" and Jenny as his "sexual roomate"
he gets drunk and then tries to eat the lasers at the dance club
On my way back to his place to see his "art". Why am I sure this is going to be nothing more than his dick in a box?
So, seriously. How does it feel to know that you're riding a cock that was in kindergarten when you were going to prom?
Hi, my name is Ashslay and I'll be your designated shitshow.
My penis needs a shock collar
Is it sad that I planned a a romantic trip to dunkin donuts for and with myself on Saturday, then added an equally romantic after midnight stroll through the half off candy sale? I find that worthy of adding a few cats to my collection agree?
I'm too high and old for this...
God bless the petty bitch who invented screen shot
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