Its about time the women of america have a president they can masturbate to again
it was terrible. i could've done a better job by myself.
How can she be afraid to give you a blowjob? It's not like your penis is going to turn on her and eat her.
Literally he has the smallest penis I've ever felt since 8th grade.
I woke up to three texts telling me to "go fuck myself," a panicked voicemail from my mom, and a girl thanking me... I'm not sure which I should take care of first
Yeah I tried to leave with 3 drinks and the bouncer wouldn't let me, I slammed all 3 right in front of him and football spiked them in the trash can
And then she banged "the first Italian rapper"
seeing two hook-ups in tagged in the same picture will send chills down anyone's spine.
Omg one side of my Labia is asleep. Has that ever happened to you?
Love these next 4 months. Wake up from a college football hangover and get to put your hand down your pants and watch NFL football all day.
If you enjoy dance recitals as much as I do, that's one shitty Father's Day...
Naked and Afraid: Hangover edition
I can't base my relationships off of good dick and dogs.
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
I just found a nug casually in my room under my duffel bag. Is this a sign I need help?
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