I hate this i feel like im wasting my youth here. I should be off hooking up with boys around the world and having awkward next morning convos in different languages!!
McDonalds has hash browns for only a quarter!....how many u want?
All of them
I had never watched a guy jack off to me before, but let me tell you, it was a very uncomfortable experience.
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
i'm sitting pantsless eating potato chips and watching porn before he picks me up for our date. I hope he's ready for this...
She wore that goddamn strap-on all night. When she was playing guitar hero it kept getting in the way but she just wouldn't take it off.
She was mid-sentence and then BOOM the hammock broke off the tree. I about pissed myself. Hot Sprite and Vodka make the world go round.
It sounds like I am drunk, but I am not. I just have a concussion.
When he opened the car door the whole thing fell off. Even that can be forgiven via his monster cock.
A gay guy went down on me in the club bathroom and then fixed my makeup for me
its gonna be a great night
We hooked up with 2 friends last night as always and she stole their fucking cocaine and I just had to drive to their house and make her give it back to him hahshshahahah only me
So, in keeping with the last two years, are we going to watch the new Hobbit movie on acid again? It's kinda starting to feel like a Christmas tradition.
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
and idk now I have nine bags of lettuce in my fridge
Umm I might be late. Also I am may or may not have mayonnaise on my ass
Randomize
