Its Shannon Doherty lazy not Forest Whittaker lazy
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
Amazing how you can get from "Merry Christmas" to sex in three texts.
I could have done it in 2
theres pictures of him knuckle deep in her, both of them thumbs up and cheesin. someone should take her kid away
I'm going to keep a tally of how many lives I ruin this summer. Starting today.
Already at 3 and it's not even noon.
I woke up to a 3rd person picture of my own dick sent from a 1-800 number..
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I'm in the fetal position watching the little mermaid and trying not to die. When do you come home?
I'm having a martini with dinner. A new level of class.
I'm stoned and eating mustard, also a new level of class.
I'm still working on figuring out my birthday blowjob schedule. I'd love to just have all three of them get in there but I get the feeling they wouldn't like that.
this new dose of ADD meds is totally being waisted with the unemployed new graduate thing if only I could add my hyper focused side effects to a coverletter
You know you're gay when you have to have your coworkers explain to you why your bracket is terrible
Ok next time we are filming it. You bring the camera and I'll buy more socks
He talked me out going to the bar. No one ever talks me out going to the bar..this is fucking love.
She pulled out a water gun filled with vodka and called it her weapon of choice tonight. She's fine.
Randomize
