He is such a slut. More and more my type.
Just saw remains of her puke from last night on my pants.... thats got "Apology BJ" written all over it.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
Before I dignify that with an answer, let me get this straight. You're asking me if I wiped my ass on the towels?
Like not in a "I wanna have sex with you way" more like a "I wanna cuddle your mustache way"
My bed is full of blood and feathers
So I went to daintily fall onto my bed like I was in a hotel commercial and I completely missed my matress and landed on my floor. Just thought u should know.
Still stoned. I like your bong. It can stay. No others, though.
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I'm out of milk so I'm dunking my Oreos in Bailey's; this is my life now.
Casually blacked out last night and apparently told him he couldn't come back to bed until he got me Taco Bell.
Look, all I'm looking for is a good time and someone whose chest I can bury my face in
I'm eating a block of cheese like its a sandwich in the tsa line
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
Granted, I did not plan to spend ANY hour of the last day of 2020 sober.
Randomize
