so pretty much your parents know your seeing a girl on the side, let her come over and just dont say anything to your girlfriend?
i crashed through a building. if that counts then yes, i went out with a bang.
I just tried to sell my homemade "lightning bolt stencil for pubes" on Etsy.
I am way too high for this. Some guy just keeps talking about music and life goals and he apparently has lived in every city we mention we are going
I'd be a gr8 surrogate. I'm gonna love your fetus
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
He asked me "did you used to go to church" while we were having sex.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
Drinking a pint every 8 mins right now. Power hour aint shit.
Good luck
Trying doe a second hour and I.cant open my eyes
I just tried to brush my hair with a can opener. Who gave you that brownie
Dude I'm hungover as fuck in a bed in Baltimore with another man... I don't think I can make it.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
After passing out at the kitchen table, you woke up in my parents bed in between them. With no pants on.
He's just been a dick since he set his face on fire. I just wanted to eat a fucking hot dog.
Unexpected pussy is the best kind. Never expected to get any from a stranger at my little brother's bar mitzvah.
Mazeltov!
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