You can't motorboat a personality
Is licking assholes a new fad or something?
oh, and bring over your fire extinguisher. we're gonna get the mailman again
If Jimminey Cricket were here with me he would be so disappointed.
easter eggs filled with ecstasy. it's what jesus would do.
Take this only to mean that we love you, but we're having a serious, half-hour, hypothetical discussion about how far we think we could throw you.
Hey couldn't find water bottle to put margs in whole bottle in purse gonna stop and get cups and ice from starbucks and burrito from una mas want a quesadilla
you're being stingy. if you didnt want people to have sex on your couch, you shouldve specifically said so.
There's sex hanging in the air like a pinata. European people are no joke.
Yeah you insisted everyone watch Space Jam at 2 in the morning then you cried the whole way through it. You were the very worst kind of drunk.
YOU COME FROM SAD WHALE FAMILY, DEEP IN OCEAN!
Lol yeah. Because I just woke him up to blow him for being hot.
Ok thats great. so just to recap: you fucked a billionare in his penthouse last night, and I had a glass of wine on the toilet.
I mean, it's good for a lot of things. Just not the inside of your vagina
Well neither is bbq sauce but I dont judge kinks
I'll talk to you in a minute. Gotta put my peacocks away
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