In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
I have a meeting at work in an hour, I'm so hungover going outside is NOT happening there are roads and shit I'll totally get myself killed.
I feel like if Miami and New Jersey fucked each other and produced a baby that would summarize the bar I'm in.
His morals are debatable, but his heart or perhaps his penis is in the right place.
His penis is crooked. Right place? Maybe he starts there, but then he slants.
I feel like we should at least be hungover if we're gonna be this grown up.
Just visited the liquor store.... for the 4th time today. shits gonna get weird
And all I ask is the occasional "welcome home from work" blowjob.....and for you to fold my laundry. I hate folding laundry
What's the mantra for Sunday?
I will not have sex with him.
If there was a bread and water delivery truck id make sweet hungover love with it.
I made one of my coworkers cheers to me not being pregnant. I've never talked to him before tonight. Keeping it classy.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
She asked me if I would fuck her with my storm trooper mask on
It's going to turn into you and me throwing down in a devastating lip-synch battle while everyone else stands around awkwardly.
the guy had "bad bitches only" tattooed above his penis...
she was just meowing in the corner eating frozen chicken nuggets
Randomize
