It smelt so bad when i tried biting off her underwear that i didn't want to touch with my mouth
I just saw a woman point to her daughter and scream at her husband THIS IS YOUR GENES, THIS IS YOU.
Someone sent me a drink from across the bar. It was water.
I wish alcohol would automatically work as birth control if you have sex drunk.
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
JAMES WASHOMGTON STATE ATTACKED US
WE'RE FYCKED UL HARDCORW
THE REISLING ATRACEX US
I lost count after the 4th body shot but I think I'm wearing at least 3 different peoples clothes.
We talk about tequila and blow jobs the way that normal people talk about the news and the weather.
Definitely just puked in this corn maze. Families are staring.
She's trying to put on her dog muzzle on her self
I haven't filled him in on Operation "find a sugar daddy & suck dick for money" yet, but I'm sure he just wants me to be happy.
I am so sorry for drunk texting you r kelly lyrics
I booty texted him nothing but three exclamation points at 3:05am and he was in my bed 17 minutes later, lest you think punctuation is not important.
I haven’t taken my socks off in over 36 hours. I should add that to my bumble profile.
In what world does 'I'm awake' at 2:30 in the morning on a wednesday translate to 'let's fuck' in the span of one text? Where has the romance gone?
Randomize