She's hot and she went to Notre Dame. I want to fuck the Catholic right out of her
I feel dirty and I went home alone. Bars should be like airlines and make fat girls pay double for everything.
I told him to show me what he was made of and he came on my face. law students are so technical.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
just joined the mile high club. if this plane crashes because of this text, it was worth.
She said to bring taco sauce. Hoping that's a euphemism.
Shit. I'm running the whole hotel right now. The front desk girl had to run home because she left her vibrator on the counter and her brother, mom, and grandmother surprised her and are showing up to her place before she gets off work. This will end badly no matter what.
Here's the thing, you got road head in two different cars tonight. You feel lucky yet?
Ims textiofg thsi woht my noes bcuz my hansd aer stli handcuffde to teh bedfrme. Help me
I'm pretty sure "good advice you would give to a freshman for achieving success" isn't constituted by introducing them to your addy dealer...
it is my civic duty to ensure the success of our youth.
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
My neighbor is burning all of her ex's things in a metal drum outside the window. Guess who's going to make a new friend?
if i hadn't ended our catfight by hugging you one of us might be dead right now
Does fucking him in the back of the car with the sun roof retracted count as star gazing?
Some sorority went “Dick or Treating” at a frat house and now the Halloween parties are canceled
Randomize
