if i get an abortion, then will you go out with me?
I feel like I should I write an apology note to the frat for falling down stairs, passing out on the couch, and chugging the entire bottle of burnetts at semiforml last weekend. Apparently I was the main topic of discussion at their chapter meeting last night.
Do you think it'll be awkward standing up at their wedding knowing I've slept with both the bride and the groom?
WHATEVER CLASS IS PLAYING "TOOT IT AND BOOT IT" AT 8:30 IN THE MORNING, I WANT IN.
Rode my bike to work still drunk. Almost threw up on a camper while getting him out of his parents car.
If anyone ask I'm rushing for brotherhood, not so that this bartender will suck my dick
Let me put it this way - if I had a list of things I would like between my legs, she would rank below the cello I turned into firewood sophomore year.
yesterday you declined a drink because you "didn't want to be responsible for it" ok kanye...
Let's get drunk and go to Walmart and just tackle people at random.
I like to feed my guinea pigs before I get stoned. In case they get contact high and get the munchies. It's only polite.
so it took us like 45 minutes to get into the party.... then when we wanted to leave we were blocked and forced to stay.
....you got kicked INTO a party??
There is a car windscreen wiper in my handbag... Not my car's, not ok.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
uh...sober saturday NEVER has a good ring to it.
Its amazing how creative youll get when your house has been out of toilet paper for a week and a half
Randomize
