how lazy do you have to be to be a fat vegetarian?
I bought the love spell lotion from victoria secret so it atleast smells like a girl is present while I'm masturbating
i'm so sad bro, I can't get any pussy. I'm so sad
I'm sober in pajamas at a bar. Nothing is ok about that statement.
i wish i coudl send you meat via computure
It'll be like the burning bush except without moses and with pubes.
Maybe you shouldn't go to cosmic bowling, i don't know if cum glows and I don't wanna find out i'm sure his parents don't either.
I created a new solo drinking game. You need a handle, a laptop, and a shitty internet connection. Start watching the fort video in the que, play the snake while the videos constantly load, and take a drink everytime you fuck up. There was a video of a an asain female Justin beiber impersonator full screen when I woke up.
Don't matter if she's straight, I'll get her. I'm not called The Transformer for nothing
And then we will celebrate by drinking and making fun of him. As per usual.
Apparently I missed the "You may have to jack off a horse" part of the application.
Do u remember giving me permission to fuck ur dad and then getting super pissed at me when i said ew?
I have suspicion of morning wood.
How are you unsure as to the current state of your penis?
too bad burritos don't cuddle back
Weird. And pubic lice are now endangered so your hairy balls can rest easy
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