All I want to do right now is burp, puke, and fart. In that order.
i guess i finally out drove tiger woods this morning..
we just fucked in the mcds parking lot
wasnt he a virgin
yes we got celebratory milkshakes after
In a meeting with the accounting department. This shit is even more boring in real life and there isn't a professor to wake me up.
ATMs should seriously have built in breathalysers, I would save so much money.
high. he's playing 'oops i did it again' on the ukelele. is this real life?
He said I could liberate his beef and all I could think about was how I don't eat veal for political reasons.
I really couldn't care less what she looks like. That's why The Lord Our God gave us doggy-style.
Twist to Josh's story, he had a gyro in his hand and never dropped it even after he got knocked the fuck out
as much as I don't like snorting drugs, I would totally be fine with someone doing a line off my ass. that's just a whole new up
Dropped the bowl in the litter box. But it landed face up. What do I do?
I had 2 shots but she spilt one on me. Kinda mad but kinda grateful
mcfuck me up
MCFUCK ME UP INSIDE
However many condoms you have, it isn't enough.
Help. Why am I so naked?
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