Question. A woman tells her guy she's on birth control. Stops taking it to have a kid to force the guy to be responsible and with her. What rights does that guy have
None he's f-d
he whispered in my ear that he would be upstairs and i should come up. i stayed downstairs. he came back down and repeated to whisper in my ear. this happened about 5 times until he passed out.
You guys were grinding to YMCA. I knew you were going to hook up with him.
slowly transforming into a stationary lump of steel. how can you tell me that was JUST weed
Two hours into move in day and the ambulance is here already.
Joe decreed the livingroom and the hallway up to the burn mark his kingdom. I think this is the point of 'stage an intervention'
He blew a .19 and then slurred "well I did have some rum cake earlier today officer".
I just saw a bunch of drunk old guys riding on the side of a modified old fire truck yelling at cars and smoking while they looked for parking...promise we will be just like them when we grow up?
I'm craigslisting fire trucks as we speak
sex in a hospital.. check
I've been back for one day and I've already given two bjs. Improvement from last year.
I accused the cab driver of smoking weed in the taxi then I remember it was me.
It's true. There would need to be A LOT of data collection. Aka, dick-catching. I volunteer as tribute.
I have to tell him to stop eating me out so I'm not late for work; my life could be a lot worse.
Do you know who changed all my phone contacts into characters from Harry Potter?
He Who Must Not Be Named.
Fuck you.
Umm my dog ate your vibrator. Sorry 😬
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