i just met a girl who was sent to the hospital for using her phone as a vibrator and got electrocuted. 4 weeks later she got sent back for shoving a hot dog up there. welcome to the teenage american society
I know I'm not learning anything when I can't even spell the name of the class I'm taking
As of tonight I have officially had sex during every Disney movie.
im pretty sure thats the first step to being a pedafile
She asked me why there was $2 in the lunchmeat drawer of the fridge and BBQ sauce all over the kitchen... I'm not sure but I know it has something to do with you
So I used the "I've never cummed from a BJ before" line last night.
And that worked?
9 for 9! Not only does it give them a goal but they have a sense of accomplishment afterwards.
it was frightening. in my opinion the only thing that should resemble a vagina is a vagina.
it would be nice to just get drunk, not hook up with anyone, and not die this weekend
They're calling for 20 inches of snow but I'll have a dirtbike for emergency trips to the liquor store. Even if I crash it won't hurt.
I haven't had nearly enough lesbian experiences to fully commit to this relationship.
You could say the cab driver was less than excited when we called his personal cell phone at 4am for directions back to our hotel after having blacked out at the club
He managed to tell me he was blind in one eye and convince me to have sex with him in the same conversation. It's love.
I don't know what it was about last night, but every bar that i went to there was at least one girl there that i had done something with. I'm sure the girl that i went with knew because they all grabbed my penis and told me to call them.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
It was the cape. I can't control myself when I wear a cape.
I think the God that I only kind of believe in, definitely hates me.
Randomize
