is it wrong that I prefer my women with low self esteem and a smidgen of an eating disorder?
U know its gonna be a great day when the guy at the liquor store waves at u cause u walked by
New word for getting laid so we don't sound like whores in public when we are talking about it : stamp the passport
I don't know if the fire truck was perfect timing or if she actually burned something down.
She's sitting on the couch buck naked, eating a cupcake for dinner. I'm breaking new ground as a parent here.
He told me he was 'pondering the natural wonder that is my ass'
Like, dude. I'm already fucking you, you don't need to wax poetic.
Isn't he wasted enough that he might actually mean it and not just be trying to get you to fuck him without a condom?
i don't know where i am. i made bad decisions. i think this guy is dead.
We should tie ourselves together anytime there is any type of alcohol involved. It's the safest way. I either end up with freshmen or weird ex bfs. You end up with a large cowboy. This is not good for us
Remember, ur body isn't a visitors center
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
Sorry I disappeared. Do you hate me?
Not at all, did you not hear me clapping outside your car on our way out?
Our conversation concluded a weekly schedule of casual sex in between classes.
Wait, how many people just saw my dick?
This is bullshit, I shit my pants for the 1st time in 30 years, stuck on the 405, fuck this shit.
Depends
We were having sex and he started doing some weird swivel move. I was like wtf and he said sorry just trying to pop my knee.
Randomize
