I woke up this morning really drunk with my Christmas lights on and two owls in my bed.
So i've def seen the girl running for student body VP getting fingered in a bar.
Theres a disney princess moonbounce on karen st. and I'm drinking beer at a little league field. this might end with me in jail.
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I just saw a guy in a sombrero and holding an inflated blow-up doll in all her "glory" get escorted out of the mall. I hate Marley.
I am stoned and listening to the Olympics music I downloaded on Saturday. Best 6 dollars I have ever spent.
I was screaming out for people to gather the townsmen and the mayor so we could hang him
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
He kept singing Happy Birthday to himself, yelling at the bouncers for not letting him in, and telling them his "father will hear of this." He was like a drunken Scottish Draco Malfoy.
This morning I found four opened yet full beers on my desk and my towel rack pulled off the wall and in bed with me
sex in a hospital.. check
I just can't have sex in the car again. it's just too much
I'm upset for all the future generations who can't drunkenly get cheesy bread
She just kept feeding people pretzels and sayying "You're such a good goldfish."
Randomize
