well that was a long night...
dude, you were pretty messed up... what happened?
no idea... but i still woke up with my pirate hat on
I am not sure how to feel about the fact that I was turned on by someone with a penis. I can't believe Lady Gaga would do this to me. :(
tonight is proof that a xbox 360 will always be more reliable than a girl ever will
and a girl gets the red ring of death every month
im at that stage where all she has to do is cough or something and it pisses me off
He showed up 3 hours late wearing roller skates and acted like nothing was wrong with that.
Like. I probably should fuck him. I owe him for breaking his thumb.
I forgot that I thought it would be a good idea to hairspray my toilet seat last night after I took 12 shots of vodka so when I just went to pee, I stuck to the toilet. Never drinking again.
It was like bizarre-o star trek. I shamefully went where every man has gone before.
I was kind of torn between "Wow, this is awkward," and "Wow, my therapist is hung."
I found three vicadin and a pint of fireball with the note. In case of emergency drink me under their sink.
I woke up in a chipotle parking lot with an industrial sized box of condoms and a bag of dounut holes. I need Jesus
So what did you do since you didn't go out?
...ate chocolate and watched bring it on....it's like I don't even know what it would look like to be straight.
ya I had reallllllly good sex last night too that will probably get me evicted
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
I'm not big on drama but you need to put your pants on and leave.
Randomize